I remember making the decision to study law instead of pursuing my dream of becoming an electronic engineer, a path I thought I was destined for. My family, friends, and even I were surprised, considering all the times I had helped them fix their tech, invent something cool, or astound them with my tech genius. My sister, as she sat next to me while I examined my degree options, said something like, "You're already amazing at tech. Why don't you challenge yourself and do law?" I sat there, considering her suggestion, feeling both challenged and scared. After a day or two, I made my final decision: "Yeah, why not?" My journey into the law was an absolute rollercoaster into a deep and dark abyss.
Fresh out of high school, I quickly realised I wasn't the best at everything as I had once thought. Law demanded impeccable English, clear speaking, presentation skills, and much more - skills I did not have. Studying law made me feel like an idiot! I nearly failed my first semester because I couldn't connect the dots, and just as I was on the brink of leaving law, everyone around me believed I could succeed. Maybe fate was pushing me in this direction, and the challenge is what life said I had to face.
Studying law put me at my lowest and left me feeling lost. I noticed myself slowly detaching from my existence, becoming ungrounded as I studied tirelessly every day until 2-3 am. I found it hard to connect with everyone around me, even though many would say I knew a lot of people on campus and was friendly. My emotions were buried within me, overshadowed by sorrow and uncertainty about whether law was the right choice. I've always wondered if there were other students suffering the same way. My mistake was that I never asked. I never connected with those around me and opened up. I thought I had to deal with it on my own and so I pushed people away.
This is only part of what I have to say. Of course, studying law provided me with many positives, however I believe it's about time that lawyers and law students are more open about their experiences. By sharing your personal experiences as a lawyer or law student, you contribute to shaping a more efficient, supportive, and fulfilling legal profession for yourself and others in the field.
If you are in the dark right now, the light is within you and a journey lies ahead of you. You have to ground yourself. Allow your mind, body, and your soul to release the burden. Sit there in the discomfort and vulnerability a little bit each day. Feel the emotions rise and understand them, and then let go. Talk to your most trusted friends and family. They will bring you closer to your true self and direct you to the help you need.
I will be sharing more of my personal experiences about studying and working in law, and so can you. The future of your fellow law students and learned friends depend on it, and I dare say it is your our turn. Our turn to make a change.